Humor from Contemporary Philosophers

Humor as a Healing Force

Humor is inexpensive alternative medicine!

Neuropathy Patient Billy Vaughan shared the following tidbits of HUMOR from some well-known philosophers of the modern age.

“As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind – every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.”  John Glenn

“America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real, but the moon landing was faked.”  David Letterman

“After the game, the King and the Pawn go into the same box.”  An Italian Proverb

“The only reason they say, ‘Women and children first’ is to test the strength of the life boat.”  Jean Kerr

“I have been married to a Communist and a Fascist and neither would take out the garbage.” Zsa Zsa Gabor

“You know you’re a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn’t.” Jeff Foxworthy

“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” Prince Phillip

“Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself”.  Harrison Ford

“The best cure for sea sickness is to sit under a tree.”  Spike Milligan

“Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.”  Robin Hall

“Having more money doesn’t make you happier, I have 50 million dollars, but I was just as happy when I had 48 million.”  Arnold Schwarzenegger

“We are here on earth to do good unto others.  What the others are here for I have no idea.”  Unknown

“If life were fair Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.” Johnny Carson

“Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.”  Steve Martin

“Home cooking:  Where a man thinks his wife is.”  Jimmy Durante

“The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.” George Roberts

“If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport”. Jonathan Winters

About the Author

LtCol Eugene B Richardson, USA (Retired) BA, MDiv, EdM, MS

Col Richardson has suffered with severe neuropathy for over 45 years. A 27 year military veteran and veteran of the Vietnam War, he was diagnosed with a progressive chronic peripheral neuropathy resulting in severe disability. This diagnosis has been confirmed as due to exposure to Agent Orange. It was not until 2010, 42 years after his exposure to Agent Orange, that his diagnosis was recognized by Veterans Affairs as service connected.

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